11.14.2014

On a list of reasons to join Starfleet, I didn't think a swimming pool would even rate

(via Memory Beta)

Look at this gem from the Memory Beta page for the Northampton-class:
These vessels were designed for deep-space stationing in all sensitive areas, to prevent alien aggression. The Northampton vessels were sought after assignments by crews and troops due to numerous recreation decks and spacious quarters for the crewmembers and marines. Swimming pools, gravball courts, and gymnasiums were all located in the lower hull adjacent to the shuttlebay and near the engineering section. Although the hull design incorporated the single-engine lock often found in Andorian designs, the Northampton was a Martian design.
The bit about the ships being sought after because of swimming pools and other amenities caught me as funny. I can just imagine a cadet about to graduate from Starfleet Academy, getting ready to go out and exploring the galaxy, discovering new life and all that jazz, then ditching that in favor of a swimming pool.
Human Resource Officer from Starfleet: "So, I see you went the Sciences route in Starfleet. We always need more science officers, what was your specilization?"
Cadet: "Exo-botany. I wrote dissertation on the Xindi tulip."
HRO: "Interesting, interesting. Well, we do have an opening on an Oberth science vessel, the USS Sheldon Cooper and they do a lot of research on planet life, including flora, so you'd fit right in."
Cadet: "Great!"
HRO: "Now, I should tell you that an Oberth is a pretty small ship, so it doesn't have all the amenities of larger ships."
Cadet: "That's fine. Sacrifice is expected in the name of science, after all."
HRO: "Good to know, because you certainly won't find a swimming pool on an Oberth like the Northampton's have."
Cadet: "Well that's fine with--I'm sorry, but did you say 'swimming pool'?"
HRO: "Hmm? Oh yeah, the Northampton-class starships all have pools, gyms, grav courts, etc. Big quarters too, even for the most junior officers. Now, let's get the paperwork started so we can move you on out to the Sheldon Cooper."
Cadet: "Uh, actually, I think I've changed my mind. Is there an opening on any Northamptons?"
HRO: "Yeah, a couple, but they don't really need an exo-botanist."
Cadet: "Well, I mean why should have matter? I don't think one should necessarily be limited by their degrees. A person can grow in other directions and my direction is clearly toward a Northampton!"
HRO: "But they're warships - all they do is patrol and guard sectors of space! There's no science or exploration involved!"
Cadet: "Look, I know how to fire a phaser and I've got fists perfect for punching aliens in their faces, so what more do I need?!"
HRO: *facepalming* "Goddammit..."

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